When you realized that your marriage was on the brink of failure, after you dealt with the disbelief that it could happen to you, I hope you began to pray. For me, I began praying that God would just stop this nonsense and put us back together. At this time I still harbored bitterness and anger that my wife was not relenting. It was then that I was lead to pray differently.
I learned that I needed to pray for God to begin to change me. I took inventory of my feelings and found that I needed to get rid of alot of unnecessary feelings. I prayed for patience, kindness, release of anger, and many other things. Over time, my heart softened. I was able to forgive. I was able to stop looking at the negative circumstances. I was able to see the many blessings that Our Lord was showering down on me, my wife, my marriage, and my kids. My heart had softened.
Over time, my dealings with my wife began to improve. We were not arguing, we were both starting to give in more, we even began to laugh about things when we would see eachother and talk. Her heart had softened.
This happened through prayer. Our God is more powerful than any problem, any circumstance, any lie the evil one can throw our way. Our God can soften hearts, for it is written:
“‘ I will sprinkle clean water on you, and you will be clean; I will cleanse you from all your impurities and from all your idols. I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. And I will put my Spirit in you and move you to follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws....Then the nations around you that remain will know that I the LORD have rebuilt what was destroyed and have replanted what was desolate. I the LORD have spoken, and I will do it.’” Ezekiel 36:25-27, 36
Pray for God to soften your heart first. Then pray that He will soften your wife's heart.
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